“Suddenly I’m on my knees, gasping for air”
Dear Eve 6 Guy:
Over a decade ago, when I was a freshman in high school, I was involved in my youth group, which went on an annual ski trip. I was totally fascinated because I really wanted to get on the slopes, have a good time with my first girlfriend and enjoy being eight hours away from my family, in a foreign country. During this time, I was a totally nice guy, just a passive do-gooder who didn’t really believe in revenge or getting back at people.
Meanwhile, a senior I’ll call Tristan came on a trip. Tristan and I were on the same soccer team, but I didn’t really know the guy and mostly stayed away from him because I realized he was a little out of place. Maybe he had some unresolved issues.
One of the days of the trip, we went ice skating. The girls and boys split up, so I was doing general hooligan teen shit with my friends. On the track, I spent the first 20 minutes warming up on the ice. Meanwhile, my friends got hold of Tristan’s sunglasses and started playing an escape game. Like I said, general hooligan shit. Then one of my friends handed me the glasses and I ran off, now suddenly part of the game.
Tristan couldn’t keep up with me and literally went crying to our chaperones over this ordeal. When I see this happen, I skate over to them and hand them the glasses. I remember we were about to make up when he, still wearing his skates, kicked me in the fucking dick. Suddenly I’m on my knees, gasping for air. I am holding my garbage in my hands, but since I am very warm, I cannot tell if my penis is bleeding or not.
The rest is a bit blurry. I remember going back to the hotel room, my friends surrounding me as I pulled down my pants to look at the damage. I had a bruise on the head of my penis. But no blood. I was, for a moment, grateful. I still have a slight bruise that I hope to carry with me for the rest of my life, but other than that, no health issues related to what he did to me.
As far as I know, Tristan never suffered any consequences for his behavior. I didn’t consider pressing charges, because we were in a foreign country and I wasn’t familiar with the rules, but honestly, I didn’t even ask or investigate. He moved out about two months later, before I had time to process things.
Time passed and I tried to forget about it completely, but I feel that this incident is unresolved. Tristan is a mutual friend on Facebook, and every time I see his name I get mad. I feel like he should have taken some kind of action to see that something was done to remedy the situation, but he never did. As far as I can remember, he got away with it without even having to apologize to me.
I’ve thought about reaching out to him to let him know my feelings, but I walk away every time. I’m not completely over this nice guy thing yet, but I’m trying to lead a life where I tell people how I feel instead of keeping it all bottled up. What would you do, Eve 6 Guy?
— Bruised and Confused
